Navigating Postpartum with a Toddler: Gentle Support for Mums
Postpartum life with a toddler on the loose? It’s a full, wild, often chaotic ride — and you’re not alone in feeling pulled in every direction. Caring for a newborn and a toddler is a huge transition. It’s tender, overwhelming, and often done without the village we were meant to have. Postpartum isn’t meant to be done in isolation — and you’re not meant to do it all alone.
It’s more than okay to ask for help — in fact, it’s wise. Each member of your family has needs. They’re different, and they all matter. If community support isn’t available to you right now, we see you. That’s a hard truth, and it deserves acknowledgement.When it’s just you, a baby, and a toddler — here are some small, tangible ways to help soften the edges of this season.
This season is a balancing act of beauty and survival, of presence and surrender.
Calling in support can be a game-changer.
Here are some practical ways others can support your family while you're navigating life with a newborn and toddler:
A friend popping over to hang out with your toddler for a couple of hours
Someone taking them out to burn off energy at the park
A loved one holding your baby so you can have rare one-on-one time with your toddler
Say yes to whatever makes life easier — even if it’s something you’d usually say no to (screen time, extra snacks, etc). Sometimes that reset is exactly what everyone needs.
Food support is essential
Set up a meal train with friends or community
Order ready-made meals — we love Just Nourish (frozen), Emily the Meal Dealer (fresh) and postpartum pantry staples from Elan House of Wellness , or check your local options
Prepare meals and snacks ahead of time — a perfect job for a partner or support person
Meeting Your Needs First
Your wellbeing matters. When you're supported, your children feel it. Here are gentle ways to take care of yourself in this season:
Don’t skip breakfast. Feed yourself like you feed your children
Take a long, hot shower when your partner gets home. Let the tension wash away
Text or call a friend when it all feels like too much. Being heard matters
Go to bed early if you can. Even a short rest before night wake-ups can help
Keep easy meals in the freezer or lean on takeaway without guilt
Breathe deeply. A slow exhale tells your body “I am safe”
Step outside. A moment with your feet in the grass, a deep breath, a stretch — it helps
Lower the bar. Truly. Looking after your children is enough
How to Support Toddlers After Baby Arrives
Toddlers and siblings feel the shift just as much as we do. They may not have the words for it, but the emotions are big. Here's how to hold them gently:
Provide connection through play or a toy basket they can access while you feed
Make space for big emotions. Feelings are meant to be felt
Create short, focused moments of one-on-one time — even five minutes counts
PLAY. It’s the ultimate reset and connection tool
Prioritise your own wellbeing. When you're regulated, they're more likely to be too
Meeting Your Newborn’s Needs While Parenting a Toddler
Babies need the basics — and your closeness. Here's how to stay grounded in what matters most:
Feed, rest, clean nappy, and connection
Babywearing can be a lifesaver when your hands are needed elsewhere
Prep bottles or pump gear in advance if you need them — something your partner can help with
And again — meet your own needs first where you can. This is a repeat on purpose
Lastly, we are biased, but for good reason. Hire a postpartum doula. Truly.
You deserve hands-on, non-judgmental support. Someone to see what you need and gently provide it. Someone to witness it all, with no expectations or pressure to perform. Beyond community support, which many don’t always have access to call upon, this can be such a worthwhile investment in your family.
There will be hard days. It will be messy, and it will be exhausting. But within the fog, you can build in small, sparkling moments – a warm drink in silence, a short walk in the sun, a real chat with someone who gets it.
Cushion the hard with gentleness.
Hold yourself with compassion.
Postpartum with a toddler can feel like a whirlwind — but in the swirl, you can carve out softness, connection, and care.
You are doing your best, and your best is GOLDEN.
With love,
Imren and Josie x
Imren is a Postpartum doula and mother of two. Josie is a Birth and postpartum doula and mother of two. If you would like to read more about them head here.
